Sri Lanka News

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Tiger daughter shuns Tiger leaders

(Zoo-Paa hurt at not being invited; some Canadian Tamil Congress men may be attending the party. Anton Balasingam told not to give press interviews regarding the party for security reasons. Dirty Sethu may represent the father at the function but Irish immigration clearance for him is very much in doubt).

Duwaraha is going to celebrate her 20th birthday in grand style in Ireland. A handpicked group of VIPS, whoever that may be and certainly not Eric Solheim, have been invited. Security factors are so demanding and tough, the poor old father, who is not even safe in the Wanni Bandit Zone, will not be attending it. There is also the question of transport from Wanni wilds to the Irish greens in far off lands; via Maldive Islands is considered too risky.

It is generally agreed that it will be a party Ireland has not seen since the Middle Ages. Duwaraha’s brother Charles Anthony, not named after Anton Balasingam, will also grace the occasion. The preparations are quite hush-hush and security is in full gear because Karuna Amman has indicated a desire to be present and bless the 20-year old whose nappies he changed when she was in Wanni.

What is disturbing most Tiger bigwigs, particularly Zoo-Paa is that Duwaraha’s mother Mathivathani has placed her two feet firmly on the ground and said quite categorically that no Tiger, two-footed or even four-footed, British, Canadian, Wannian, Australian or anywhere would be welcome to the party. Zoo-Paa was quite hurt. He wanted to collect some Irish terror material, literature and weapons, under the pretext of attending the birthday bash.

Of course the literature would be beyond him but Anton Balasingam has assured him of his services provided he keeps the razor away.
There will be no limitation on the spending for the party. Bags of gold are expected to be delivered to Mathivathani by the Irish leprechauns.

These tiny men seem so pleased with the presence of the First Lady of the Republic-to-be Wanni-Eelam State in their neighbourhood but as to where they got the gold is a great mystery.
Since some Canadian Tamil Congress men including Dr Poopalapillai, wanted in Batticaloa by his alien smuggler clients, are missing from Toronto, there are rumours they took an Irish Airways flight recently and perhaps a bit of loot too with them for the birthday function.

Catering for the party will be exclusively done by Toronto’s Babu Catering who are believed to have chartered a Ryan Airways B737 to carry the food and drinks across to Ireland. It is believed to be a gift from Babu Catering.

They will also be providing drinks in the traditional “Thanneer Pandal” (water tent) fashion for all demonstrations against the Government of Canada whatever the issue is taken up by the undercover LTTE in Toronto. They want to bring Harper down and get Karygyannis as the new Prime Minister of Canada.

It is believed a number of Liberal Party members were sounded about being invited for the birthday party with seats made available to them on Ryan Air but they have turned them down with the exception of a Scarborough member.

Two priests from Pungudutivu will conduct the ritual ceremonies, both Karate doctors now serving in Scarborough.

(Catapult Thangavelu will be covering the birthday party and for this purpose, he has hired a helicopter to take aerial photographs and make air to ground reconnaissance of the event.)


May 30, 2006 - Posted by | Media Journalism, News and politics, South Asia, World News

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